Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Traffic Bitches

Ah, driving around Provo at night. There's really nothing quite like it. First I had some jackass of a guy in business attire DRIVING A MINIVAN cut me off hard to get to the turning lane and then get all pissed off when I flipped him off.

Business attire + Minivan = Mormon

What the hell did he expect? The church is definitely true but many of the people are definitely not. The driving here (as well as business ethic and almost everything else) is terrible, and in large part I blame it on Mormons. Not the culture, the people. The other part of the shitty driving I blame on the illegal aliens, who seem to think they can drive like they're in Rio when really they're in Orem.

Besides, I don't quite know what people are thinking when they cut in front of me. I'm driving a big fatty Bronco, and if they want to see who's gonna win in a crashing contest, I'm all in.

Anyways. Later on I had a woman WITH A STROLLER dart in front of me on an unlit, very dark road. WHAT THE FUCK, WOMAN????? I'm sorry, but if I were entrusted with an entire other PERSON, I would probably think twice before risking that other person's life. Ugh.



HAHA, as an aside to the above mini-rant concerning Mormons, today I told my dad the neighbor-interrupting-our-sex story (except in my version for him we were napping, I didn't really want to find out the reaction to "He was boning me REAL good, daddy!"), and his first response: "She must be Mormon. The retard."

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